I attended my beautiful cousin Annie’s wedding last night. That was my third wedding dinner this freaking year! A cute coincidence is that all the bridegrooms of the 3 weddings are in SAF =) 2 of my cousins tied the knot this year and my dear Mrs Tan is going to hold her own this November. I love going to wedding dinners. Firstly, we girls get to shop for a valid reason, buy a pretty dress (and maybe even shoes and accessories) and dress up nicely for that night. Secondly, there’s the good food (shark’s fin!!!). Thirdly, there are always some cute waiters to check out. Fourthly, don’t forget that there might be cute guests to check out too. Fifthly, I get to see my relatives whom I don’t see on a regular basis and catch up with some of them.
Lastly, and this is what I’ve come to realize recently, while in the past I might like to go to dinners for the first 5 reasons, these days I go with the intention of giving the newly weds my deepest blessings. Seeing videos of their solemnization ceremony, their 新郎迎新娘 ceremony, tea ceremony etc, seeing them genuinely happy and their parents equally delighted, makes me feel so warm in the heart.
I think I’m seriously getting old. Because when one gets old, one’s priorities change and thinking changes. Well, at least that’s what’s supposed to happen, though some people do not wise up with age. So growing older is not a bad thing at all because we appreciate more, feel more, learn more – time is not wasted. Although I must say that Time is a ruthless killer, watching my years (of youth) pass like this *snap fingers* hasn’t been easy. But isn’t it all like this? First we attend 21st birthday parties, then wedding dinners, then baby showers, and lastly funerals. Like what one of my patients said, when you get old, the place you frequent the most is the hospital!
However, it is precisely my job that makes me fear aging. Yes, aging as in body degeneration sucks big time because the human body is never made to last (don’t ask me why, ask the Creator, whom I believe is of extraterrestrial origin, so by all means, He can be Optimus Prime), so when we grow old, our body functions start to slow down and ultimately fail. And then we start to get all these diseases. Ok, not ALL of us because there are many elderly who have excellent health. But some of us spend our lives keeping fit, eating healthy, and then we get cancer or simply collapse and die like how some of the local young had.
I’m not suggesting that we can indulge in unhealthy diets and habits. A healthy lifestyle is a great preventive measure. If not, you better start saving up because medical fees and medicine costs are going to be a bitch. And to be poor AND sick is not going to be of any fun at all.
However, the worst that can happen is to be poor and sick AND alone. And that’s exactly what’s freaking me out. In my work, I see many old people who suffer from Parkinson’s disease. Of which, some of them are actually accompanied by their other halves at all times during the doctor’s consultation visits and research visits. It’s incredibly sweet to see these people in their 50s-70s, still holding hands, caring for each other, not giving up when the other’s sick. To me, they represent the true essence of marriage. If you want to get married, that’s what you should be prepared to do: stand beside each other in times of good AND bad.
There are however quite a handful of patients who are single, and I believe, they are single by choice. Though that’s not what I can truly understand. Of course, I know why they like to be single – maybe there’s the freedom they get to enjoy, no need to answer to anyone for every decision and whereabouts. What I don’t understand is why they don’t want the joys that come with couplehood (ok that isn’t really such a word). I’m not scared of doing most things alone, sometimes I even like being alone, but the next 50 years or so (assuming I’ll live to 80) alone? I think that might just kill me. Family and friends are not going to be around for you all the time because they are going to have their own families and commitments too. It’ll be your other half who’s going to spend the rest of your life with you.
I’m not implying that you should get married because it’s sad to be lonely when you are old and sick. But to me, I think it’s beautiful when you can find someone whom you truly love, think about him all the time, want to let him see something lovely which you’ve just seen somewhere, let him taste some delicious food which you’ve just discovered, let him hear this great song that you’ve just heard on the radio, and just share practically everything in your life with him.
Eh, I’m still waiting for him to come. Holding my waiting tag, while the Creator goes down his list to pair up the right couples. I just hope my number isn’t really very big because I don’t want to wait too long. When he comes, I’m going to embrace him with open arms haha, and pray that we’ll live to old age, healthy, happy and hopefully, rich. =)
